The Winter's Rose: Chapter 3 – The Lake

The Winter's Rose

Chapter 3 – The Lake

It was the first time Roberin had seen the blue haired, blue winged, tall, thin and leggy Faerie but it felt as though he had known her his entire life. He knew he had never been to the lake under the moon so large and full that its reflection filled the center of the crystal clear body of water, but it felt so familiar it was as though it was his truest home. A symphony of stars encircled the brilliant moon as giant clouds floated lazily overhead, their puffy white in stark yet beautiful contrast to the endless black of the night sky above them. The ground beneath his feet was covered in the softest, greenest grass Roberin had ever seen or stood upon. No crickets chirped, no bullfrogs sang. It was golden silence as far as his ears could hear and as purely beautifully peaceful as far as his eyes could see.

The heartbroken gardener looked around, taking it all in but his eyes came back to the blue winged blue haired Faerie and settled, never wanting to leave her Elfish features. She was pretty, even beautiful in a unique and mystical way. Her dark eyes connected with his own as if she could see into the very most hidden depths of his soul. Her smile, a mix of innocence and mischief tickled his heart and brought an unforced smile to his weary face. She was tall, perhaps only three or four inches shy of six feet. She was very thin, almost lanky but still appeared strong and healthy like an acrobat or ballerina. Roberin drank her in with his eyes and couldn’t look away. He doubted he could ever take his eyes off her.

“Hello, Roberin Gossamer,”the still smiling Faerie said to him from only a few feet away, in between the lake and the gardener. “I’m Molanna. I live in your garden. I’ve wanted to meet you for some time now.”

“The dreams… you sent them to me,” Roberin realized. “You did, didn’t you?”

“I only opened the path for you,” Molanna answered. “The dreams were always inside you, wanting to show themselves to you and ease your pain. You’ve been blocking your happy dreams with your pain. Our dreams are a reflection or a shadow of us and what we feel. I knew you had wondrous dreams inside you. I just helped you to find them.”

“And why did we never meet until now?” Roberin asked. “I’ve been dreaming such happy dreams for a month now and in all that time I didn’t know you were behind it all. I mean, I knew you or someone, something was there, in the garden, helping me to feel… things I had forgotten how to feel. I never imagined you were… well, so beautiful. Are you a Faerie?”

“Yes,” Molanna nodded. “I’m a pixie of sorts. I’m what they call a daydreaming Faerie. That is how I am able to enter your dream world; that and our shared connection with the garden.”

“I remember now!” Roberin had a flash of memories from his earliest childhood. “My mother told me about Faerie gardens. She said the castle garden was connected to one. I believed her then, when I was little, but I guess I just forgot how to believe in what I couldn’t see. But now… you are here aren’t you? This isn’t just a dream is it?”

“It is a dream, but I am really here with you by this lake; our lake,” Molanna closed the distance between them with only two strides of her long legs. “I’m here for you. I’m here because you need me, but also because I need you.”

“You need me?” Roberin asked with his face so close to the pixie’s that he could’ve leaned down and kissed her; he wanted to so badly. “But you don’t even know me. How could you need me? How could I need you?”

Molanna’s hands reached up and came to rest on either side of Roberin’s face. “I do know you, Roberin Gossamer. I’ve known you for a time without measure, since before you or I even came to be what we are today. I first saw you as a star in the sky above my garden. I knew you were my gardener, and you gave me a home and a place for my magic to grow. But I also saw your pain. I felt it and I knew you needed me. Seeing your past and experiencing your dreams with you, your dreams that show who you really are inside despite your pain, I’ve come to love you and I’ve come to need you too.”

“You love me?” Roberin wanted to argue but he knew it was true. He even realized he loved her too. All the moments he was alone in the garden and it felt like someone was holding him in a tender embrace, he knew it had been her. He knew it had been Molanna. She had taken care of him even when he had forgotten to take care of himself. She had given him back his hope and his strength and he wished now he hadn’t thrown it all away. “Molanna, I’m sorry.”

“What are you sorry for?”

“I don’t know exactly,” Roberin admitted as he searched for the right words. “I guess I’m sorry for wasting your time. I can’t be saved.”

Molanna looked intently into Roberin’s eyes, her hands still on his face. “You can be saved, but not by me; not by anyone but yourself. You have to want it and I believe you do want it. I’ve seen you. I’ve seen the real you. You are unlike anyone I’ve ever known. You are so brave, so strong, funny, handsome and charming. You are a prince, Roberin. You are the handsome Prince Roberin Gossamer.”

“No, no I’m not any of that,” Roberin pulled away from Molanna, took a step back and turned away from her. “I’m just a lowly gardener. I’m just a pathetic, crippled fool who failed before he even had a chance to try!”

“Is that really what you believe, Roberin?” Molanna asked but the other didn’t answer; didn’t even turn back around. “Well I think you’re wrong! You’re not crippled and you know it! Every part of you has healed except for your heart. You lost your mother—the only person you ever thought loved you—and now you won’t let yourself love anyone else because you’re afraid. You’re afraid that if you tell anyone you love them they won’t say it back, but that isn’t your biggest fear, is it?”

“No,” Roberin whispered, closing his eyes against the truth bubbling up inside him. “It isn’t.”

“What is it?”

“I can’t…”

“You need to Roberin,” Molanna pressed. “You need to say it. You need to hear it. You need to face it.”

After a long time Roberin finally opened his eyes and turned back around. The blue haired pixie was still there, holding him close with her eyes. He swallowed his hesitation and said it. “I’m afraid if I love someone, they’ll love me back and then I’ll lose them. Like I lost my mother. Like I lost my father. I can’t bear to lose anyone else.”

Molanna walked up to Roberin and threw her arms around him, burying her head in his chest as she squeezed him tightly. “Oh Roberin, you wonderful man. I love you and I’ll never leave you. Even if you wake up and convince yourself I don’t exist. Even if you leave the garden behind and run away. Even if you forsake me and all those who love you, you’ll never lose my love.”

Roberin couldn’t help but hug her back. He held her for what could have been hours but was more likely minutes. He closed his eyes and felt the sensation of leaving the ground; of flying up into the stars. When he allowed himself to open his eyes and look around, he found that that was exactly what he had done. The lake and its grassy shores were now far below Roberin and the blue haired pixie he still held firmly in his arms. The clouds drifted lazily by just inches above their heads.

“Wow…” was all he could say.

Molanna giggled. “Amazing, isn’t it?”

“At the very least,” Roberin couldn’t help but laugh as well.

“You can let go of me now,” Molanna told him.

“I dare not,” Roberin said as he tightened his embrace around the pixie’s slim waist. “Even for a dream that fall looks unpleasant. Besides, if I let go, if I fall, then I know I’ll wake up and I’m not ready to leave you yet.”

“It’s okay, you won’t fall,” Molanna assured him. “Trust me. Let go.”

Taking a leap of faith, Roberin closed his eyes and let go of the winged Faerie. To his surprise and great relief Molanna was right, he didn’t fall.

“I can fly?” He opened his eyes and smiled, feeling a deep sense of liberation and possibility flood over him. “I can really fly?”

“Of course you can?” Molanna giggled. “This is a dream, remember?”

Roberin breathed in the cool night air. “Amazing…”

“Come with me,” Molanna offered her hand to him. “I have something to show you.”

Roberin took Molanna’s hand and followed as she led him up through the misty clouds. The pixie sat down on the top of the cloud and motioned for Roberin to do the same. He almost expected to fall right through the cloud as easily as he had flown up through it, but yet again his dream world was filled with more possibility than his skeptical mind was capable of believing. The cloud was soft and welcoming to his body. It felt so comfortable that Roberin found himself leaning back until he was lying down, flat on his back with his legs stretched out before him, a form cushioning mass of clouds beneath him. Above him shooting stars streaked across the sky in a multitude of colors, from white to gold, from blue to red. He’d never seen anything like it. A moment later Molanna cuddled up next to him and he welcomed her with ready arms; pulling her close once again.

“She loves you too,” Molanna said after a time. “She loves you just as much as you love her.”

“Who?” Roberin asked, unable to hide the hope in his voice.

“Sela, of course,” Molanna sighed as she rested her head on the other’s shoulder. “She loves you very much.”

“How do you know?”

“She visits the garden sometimes while you’re not there,” Molanna told him. “I can feel it. She worries about you but she doesn’t know how to help you more than she has already. You need to tell her. You need to tell her you love her before it’s too late.”

“It’s already too late,” Roberin had to choke back his tears. “She’s going to marry Lord Constantine.”

Molanna almost said something but stopped herself. No one spoke for a moment but then Molanna pointed to the shooting stars that still filled the sky above.

“Do you see how they’re different colors, Roberin?” She asked and he nodded. “They come in different colors because each one is a feeling, an experience of the heart. Some are anger, some are love, some are happiness, sadness, any and all emotions but the most spectacular ones are the ones that are never seen.”

“What do you mean?” Roberin asked, confused by the idea.

“They happen when two people share one of the greatest experiences of all,” The pixie elaborated. “But it’s an experience that only happens when the two people are too caught up in the moment to see it.”

Roberin smiled. “Really? And what might this experience be?”

“A first kiss,” Molanna answered just before she pulled Roberin’s face down toward hers and kissed him fully on the lips.

Roberin easily kissed her back and was only vaguely aware of the unseen flash that streaked overhead, illuminating the lake with golden light…

Roberin woke as the orange and red light of sunset filled his small room near the top of the north tower. He didn’t feel tired or groggy. His mind was clear and his body was eager to get up and move. He sat up and saw the gift lying next to him on the bed. It was amazing. He wondered for a second if it was still part of his dream but knew it was not. What he saw before him now was real indeed. He was no longer dreaming. He was awake and glad to be. Part of him missed the lake and the clouds above it, the moon and the stars, and most especially the blue haired, blue winged and brown eyed pixie whose first kiss he could still taste on his lips, but he knew it was time to leave his dreams behind for the rest of the evening and attend to matters in his waking life.

The rejuvenated young gardener picked up the gift from his dream world and threw off his covers before stepping confidently out of bed. He placed the gift into a small box on his dresser and placed a silk handkerchief over the top of it. It was the perfect gift but not for him. He knew who it was from and he knew who it was for. It was simply astounding that such a thing could exist, but then Roberin realized, with magic, as with love, all things were possible.

Roberin sat the box containing the special gift back down on his dresser and then moved quickly to his wardrobe in search of his new clothes. He had a ball to get to and not much time left to get there.

*

The banquet was over and the dancing was winding down. The first minister had called for silence and the gathering of castle staff and Drakewood nobility were waiting eagerly for their young Queen to make her much anticipated announcement. Sela Drakewood made her way through the crowd, which parted reverently as she approached them, and came to a stop up on the dais where her throne and the one left unoccupied since her father’s passing could be seen. She had something very important to tell her subjects and her friends alike, but she did not seem eager or happy to be doing so. She looked solemn and resigned, but just as regal and beautiful as ever.

“I’m glad to see all of you here,” the Queen spoke as loud as she could, her alto voice carrying to the back corners of the large throne room which had been converted into a banquet hall and ball room for the evening. “It has been many years since our small but proud country has had two monarchs on the throne and it is past time I rectified that for the sake of all. That is why, after careful deliberation, I have reached a decision that I hope will serve Drakewood for generations to come…”

“Excuse me, your highness!” a voice called out from the back of the room where the large wooden doors were propped open and in walked a handsome young man dressed in a white suit carrying a box covered in a red silk handkerchief and leaning slightly on a long walking staff. All eyes turned to regard this mysterious young man who had been so bold as to interrupt the Queen. “I’m sorry. Forgive me. I must stop calling you that. Sela, my dear friend, I know you have an announcement to make and I know it is something very important for our fine country, but if you would allow, I would like the opportunity to give you this gift first and tell you something I think you deserve to know. May I approach?”

The first minister moved over to the Queen and whispered in her ear. “Your highness, just say the word and I’ll have the guards remove this rude young man from your sight.”

“Absolutely not, let him approach,” Sela motioned to the well dressed man she knew very well. “Roberin, my friend, please approach. I would be honored to receive you at this time.”

“Thank you, Sela,” Roberin smiled at her from across the room, keenly aware that every eye in the room was now focused on him.

Roberin took a couple steps into the room—assisted by his staff—before stopping and dropping the polished wooden staff onto the marble floor below. To the amazement of many in the room who now recognized this bold young man as Roberin Gossamer, the orphaned and crippled gardener who lived alone in the north tower, what happened next was a sight few if any of them ever expected to see. Roberin walked up to the dais and the waiting Queen, not just without his staff none had ever seen him without, but without the limp he’d had more than half his life. There was strength and confidence in the once shy and reclusive gardener that filled the room with awe and anticipation. He came right up to the Queen and handed her the box draped in red silk.

“This is a gift to you, from my garden and my heart,” he told her.

Sela smiled as she accepted the small box. “What is it?”

“Only one way to find out,” Roberin smiled with love in his once sad eyes.

Sela removed the red silk from the box, letting it glide down to the floor and was astounded at what she saw inside.

“It’s a blue rose!” the Queen beamed as she removed the flower from the small box and handed the now empty container to her flabbergasted first minister. She sniffed the blue flower and smiled even wider as she became pleasantly intoxicated by its unforgettable fragrance. “Oh Roberin, it’s beautiful! How did you…? I mean, you told me such roses didn’t exist.”

“They didn’t until I let myself believe they did,” Roberin reached out and took Sela’s free hand into both of his and he went down onto one knee with no pain at all. He looked up into the eyes of the woman he loved and saw reflected in them a hope that rivaled his own. “My majesty, my dearest Sela, I will grow for you a garden of blue roses if you should so wish. I’ll grow purple, gold, silver or jade roses should you ever grow tired of the blue. I live only for your smile. I breathe only for the chance to be near you and I fear I’ve wasted far too much time keeping this all from you. I have loved you for as long as I can remember and I have no doubt I will love you until the day I no longer remember anything at all. So please accept this rose and tell me if I am alone in this feeling. Tell me if there is a chance you could feel it too.”

A tear fell down the Queen’s cheek but the smile, that beautiful smile that Roberin would never forget, did not leave her face.

“Oh Roberin, my brave and heroic gardener,” she said after a moment. “You’ve just saved me from a fate far worse than I care to imagine. Please rise so I can kiss you now.”

Roberin did as his Queen, his true love, commanded him, and their kiss was met by thunderous applause.

Molanna smiled as she hugged her knees closer to her chest and looked up at her favorite star. Her best friend sat down beside her and joined her in gazing up into the heavens.

“Our gardener’s star is shinning much brighter these days,” Dawn remarked as she rested her head on the taller pixie’s shoulder. “It must have something to do with that spectacular Silver Star that now sits next to his.”

Molanna laughed as she rested her head on her friend’s head and then sighed. “I think you might be right.”

“Of course I am,” Dawn giggled. “I’m seven hundred years older than you. I know everything.”

“Yes, you do,” Molanna playfully agreed.

“You feel up to another adventure?” Dawn asked.

“I think so,” Molanna replied. “Where to?”

“To the capital to attend Oberon and Titania’s forty fifth wedding,” Dawn answered. “I think this one will last; at least a few hundred years anyways. Besides, I want you to meet their youngest son. He’s a changeling. You’ll like him.”

“Ok, let’s go,” Molanna bounded to her feet and took to the sky with her blue wings flapping faster than a humming bird and her best friend following close behind.

The End